There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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