Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
