Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize
