everyone is single if you try hard enough
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
