I can tuck mytits in my pants
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Vodka?
Forever.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
