told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
