How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
You took a bar mat shot.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Randomize
