your parents love me but you hate me
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
In other news, I just burned my penis
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
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