PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
A+ Viking dick
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Randomize