Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize