He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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