haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Randomize