I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Just high enough for therapy.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
