Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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