Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
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