is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
Little spoons don't ask big questions
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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