Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize