so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize