You can't motorboat a personality
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
