I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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