GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize