I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
