Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
