babies were throwing up all over the place
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
