She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
NoShamevember. You game?
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
