After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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