I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize