oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Randomize
