My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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