I CAN MOONWALK!
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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