I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I think I died a long time ago.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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