Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
