is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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