The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
