We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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