I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Dear god my vagina.
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