Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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