5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
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