You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
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