; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
