Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
