I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
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