Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Randomize
