Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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