I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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