she looked like the bat from fern gully.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
