i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
