I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize