I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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