Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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